i miss livejournal.
i think i'll reformat it and change my icon and you guys should check out my layout and comment and it'll be cute. i might even start writing in this thing again.

mood: cheerful music: Dr. Dre- Xxplosive

the perfect combination = tall can of Icehouse + good book + hot bath

this is what i've discovered today. and i have also just finished a book that i love. and i finally feel like updating my livejournal even though it seems that the part of me who loves to write in my LJ is dying. But, perhaps this is an inevitability... i vow to keep it even though i probably won't write in it anymore... is was a part of my life and i must respect the person i was but strive to embrace the person i am now.

Goodbye, my precious internet journal. Thanks for everything.

why the fuck does she have to immediately start screaming at me the second i walk in the door?

you think i'm the problem in your life. you've already explained this to me. i get the fucking picture. you give me no credit for intelligence and i will never please you. so please, just ignore me if i make you so miserable. just forget me like i'm going to forget you.

it is such a shame that my Everything In Time and Lateralus albums skip.

my computer is dying which means i can't stream Lost episodes for free anymore (a priority for summer)... i need a new computer. laptop for college... and i'm switching to a Mac. it's been decided.

only 2 more days of antibiotics for this ridiculous kidney infection... a minor setback, but other than being stuck in bed all sick for a week, my summer has been pretty cool. good times, good times. i'm definetely going to miss people more than i thought i would.

it's so gnarls that i'm never going back to Nordhoff. it's finally set in, but for these first two weeks of summer it's just been a trip and a half.
but i dunno, when i put it in perspective, it really isn't that much of a trip. putting things in (perhaps wild) perspective helps. when i failed my first driving test i watched the Discovery Health channel's special on people with "lobster claw syndrome" where their hands literally look like lobster claws and i was like well, at least i don't have lobster claw syndrome!
so i was watching this show about transvestites and how they're treated in the prison system. and one woman asked for female hormones and was denied... so one day she decided to cut her penis off in front of the guards. she explained how it was such a "beautiful feeling" and i dunno, that kind of blows my mind a lot more than thinking about high school being over.

mood: calm music: Tool- Vicarious

 i feel amazing. 
saw the Chap graduation, good fun, found a million and a half friends. knew everyone in the graduating class one way or another. made me sad, nostolgic, and corny. ( as seen here: I also feel like this is closing one door and opening another.  i'm committed to and excited for this change)

i wrote a note to Mrs. Nakao on the last page of the final that just told her thanks for making me quit my whining and do math, because it really isn't that bad. 
and i gave a bouquet of flowers to Mrs. Ogden and i felt like i made her day. 
and i sat in the journalism room, uploading CDs on the Itunes of the computers in there... because Kari, Elizabeth, Ivy, John and I all proposed at the beginning of the year that we would give the next class the gift of music for their journalism experiences.
and there are Congrats Grad! balloons in my room and i'm just getting all sentimental and mushy :)
Oh, and i'm wearing my black Converse from the beginning of 9th grade to grad night... they made it all the way through high school with me and let's just say i know them better than the back of my hand

mood: complacent music: Red Hot Chili Peppers- Hard to Concentrate

...can you rob a bank in broad daylight and get away on your bike. 


http://ojaivalleynews.blogspot.com/2007/06/bicycle-bandit-robs-mid-state-bank.html
 

mood: tired music: 65 Days of Static- The Fall of Math

listen to this song
http://radioblogclub.com/open/83659/joanna_newsom/Joanna%20Newsom%20--%20Peach%2C%20Plum%2C%20Pear

and then tell me how this chick's album (Ys) be rated

#6 album of 2006 (Spin magazine)
http://www.spin.com/features/magazine/2006/12/0601_40best/
#7 album of 2006 (Time)
http://www.time.com/time/topten/2006/albums/07.html

and tell me how can she earn reviews such as this one: http://www.drownedinsound.com/release/view/8174  ?


is this just a brutal satire on the indie scene? someone please explain this to me.

music: my ears still hurt...

picture me rollin'

today has been epic. everything i've done and thought has been laced with deep meaning.
a day of many realizations.

first realization is that i need to reconnect with people. stop trying to believe that i can give up on people because i'm just going to lose them in 4 months anyway. i want to leave Ojai with as much knowledge and respect possible. 

second realization is that i need to forgive everything

third realization is that i need to remind people of how much they mean to me much more often. 

fourth realization is that i need a new favorite band

fifth realization is that life is good.

I don't know how to put this feeling into words, but basically i feel reborn. maybe it is because i finally know what i'm doing next year. Now i really comprehend that i'm leaving. forever. i'm not scared, i'm not even worried. but maybe the feeling of scared-shitless-ness will hit me later.  but i'm excited to finally start my life in Washington DC... four months holy shit!

mood: cheerful music: Foo Fighters- Still

Mexican food is pretty much running through my veins... i had 3 Mexican meals today...and that was after slaving away for 2 days for hours upon hours working to prepare a Mexican dinner for 250 people. 

but it's all good. i'm going to be missing dank Mexican food next year because i won't be living in Southern California anymore...nor Mexico. 

i'm going to DC to look at American and have some last minute interview with GW for wait-list purposes. i still really want to go to Oregon to visit Lewis and Clark..
but damn. it's getting closer...

the good news is that i'm enjoying enjoying the time i have left here :)

Hhhaaaaa ha ha ha this is funny:   http://funnyordie.com/v1/view_video.php?viewkey=3efbc24c7d2583be6925
(link stolen from mooseek

location: my room mood: good music: Isis- So Did We

so i had a nightmare last night that i got a picture of Elvis tattooed on the outer side of my left leg... in the dream i was with Ivy and she was getting a tattoo and so i decided to get one on a whim. but afterwards i started freaking out being like "why the fuck did i pick Elvis?!" and then i looked at my chest and realized there was a chain tattoo in a circle around my chest and so i freaked out more... and then i was like "this is just a dream and i need to wake up" so i woke up and was relieved to find that i did not have Elvis chilling on my leg. 

uhm so yeah, the permanence of tattoos officially freaks me out. or maybe not. i don't know. 

gosh, no one ever writes in LJ anymore.

mood: full music: Built to Spill- Strange

what a fun 18th birthday!
so much awesomeness packed into one weekend

and next week is spring break which might just make my heart explode with happiness

mood: happy music: Simple-Fairy Tale

goddamnit. i hate being so fucking pissed off yet so completely powerless.

ditto.

 

gosh today was beautiful. 
i sat in my car and listened to an entire Smashing Pumpkins album and watched the clouds go by. 
i thought about Europe and how incredibly awesome it is going to be, and i thought about school and people and life. but i didn't try and analyze it. it just was what it was.

mood: peaceful